* about my writing *

SEMUA TULISAN DI SITUS INI ADALAH HAK CIPTA THE UNTOLD PENGAMBILAN NASKAH BAIK SEBAGIAN MAUPUN KESELURUHAN HARUS DENGAN IJIN PENGARANG. ^_^ pizzz youw

when you wish upon a star

>> Monday 31 December 2007

when you wish upon a star
and she sat down starring
doing nothing

nothing the night might do
except whispered slowly
unveiling the untold
from unyielding mind
to be pictured

did your heart jus asleep and forget to wake up
the dream remains
but the soul shattered

it is neither hope or life
i must utterly depart

when you wish upon a star
and she sat down listening
feeling shunned

detached by the world for hundred of years

can you see my heart slowly sinking
sought by the nature
can never be heard no more

can never be mend

when i wish upon a star
will you lit all the wit
or let my heart murmuring and praying

for I believe in nothing
none even your heart

but God

Read more...

...meat and round bread

>> Thursday 13 September 2007

hungry... hungry.....

i never like burger, never never never,
take me to mc Donnald , AW, or elsewhere , there will not be a single time on earth i would buy any burger..
i mean what is so special about eating meat,between many slices of veggies and two halfed round bread. can you tell the difference between one burger and another, because if other people can do that, then i can't .

:D ( LoL ) well.. like my mom always said, dont hate something with all of your heart,
coz u'll stuck with it one day..

but what do you know....
in somekind of meeting and tiring and while we're running away from many scrutinize offices politics,

i was taken to burger king
and..........
god.. it was good hehehehehehe, or perhaps, i was deadly starving at that time

if you're a fond of mushroom and many veggies, u'll love it, small , ordinary place, with only burgers , fries and pie in the menu.
and surprisingly, in other occasion, i took my two buddies stealin time in this old fashioned burger king outlet...

and they like it :D and so was our driver, and from time to time....
i keep takin my all dudez partnerz to chat n gain some rest in this place....

hmmmm....try the double size, cause i dont think the single size fit in the tummy.

Read more...

====== a TaLe OF mE =========

>> Monday 2 July 2007

I'm dreaming of you tonight
and everytime the chimes in my heart sung

I'm dreaming of you tonight
for where your heart go
I flew just right to your blues

I'm dreaming of you tonight
and see the arched sunrise bowed in his knee

I'm dreaming of you tonight
and stay unconscious when my eyes wide open

my unborn wishes comes true
each time you smile and gaze upon me

a tale of me
can only be written by you

Read more...

# night walker #

>> Friday 29 June 2007

jakarta, almost midnite
not now,
some days ago, waktu aku pulang malem
as usual, hehe but that iz fine, dont really like it, dont really think about it

and yang jelas... im hungry, ah, i got perfect word : starving.
tapi masih ada makanan kantin kok, jadi ntar nyampe tinggal maem

so i passed through the gate, security guards, yang hampir semuanya jadi kenal
(gara gara sering pulang malem) and walked along the street

masih ada ibu ibu di jembatan duduk melulu sambil terkantuk kantung,
i pressume she's a needy. jadi makan malemnya aku kasih dia hehehe
itung itung amal, yahhh sapa tau itu satu satunya makanan dia hari ini,
kan daripada ga ada, ( ga enak juga siy, tu kan dari tadi siang, tapi kasian...)


no big deal, shes happy, me too. :)))
well dia bilang tengkyuh kok ( jadi terharuu )
legaaaaaaaaa

turun jembatan, kok jalanan sepiiii banget, hik jadi sedih gitu,
ada makhluk lucu yang kurus dan terlihat menderita, kucing malang yang bikin aku pengen bawa pulang dan dikasih piara,,
tapi gak mungkin,
lagi mengais ngais makanan, tampak lapar, jadi ga tega,

mana tadi makanan udah dikasih ibu ibu di jembatan, jadinya bongkar tas deh,
kali kali ada coklat, ( kucing tida bole dikasih coklat ) atao kue,
dan hik.....

aku ga punya apa apa (@ @)
nyari warung buat beli ikan udah pada tutup,
gak tega, sedihhhh akhirnya aku pulang dan ga ngasih apa apa ke kucing tersayangku.

....anyway.. it just a little unimportant story about my way back home
kayanya nothin special,
tapi paling gak, aku jadi ngerasa bersyukur

aku bukan ibu ibu di jembatan yang harus ngantuk nungguin orang ngasih sesuatu,
aku bukan kucing malang yang harus dianiaya manusia manusia tak berhati yang menganggap kucing itu makhluk hina..

dan diantara perasaan yang nelangsa,... ( karena ga bisa nulung kucing)
masih ada rasa legaaaaaaa dikit,
karena aku ada kesempatan untuk bersyukur..

........................ ^_^

Read more...

# ingenue #

^_^ happy as an ingenue....

R u ..? R u ... ?
im the only one who cannot recognize her own reflection in the mirror

cape hari ini :) cape nangis heheheh
dalem ati dan di luar ati.
i dunno why.....just does.

tapi udah ga mau mikirin lagi.

let those sadness came, and they'll be dissapointed when they're knocking my door.

Read more...

.... crazy little things called..happiness...

>> Wednesday 27 June 2007

malam di bawah langit langit kusam
di bawah atap atap kering penuh lubang AC menggantikan lubang lubang tikus
yang tergeser ke sudut bangunan..

beberapa jari masih berjingkat jingkat di atas laptop
dan mata yang merayap ke sela sela monitor yang mati hidup mati hidup

dipaksa terjaga oleh lampu lampu yang berderet seperti bintang
bayangan manusia manusia yang lalulalang seperti pasir yang bergerak gerak ditimpa ombak

dan temen sebelahku lagi ngupil hehehehehe
(...merusak imajinasi yang pengen nulis barang barang indah...)
kekekekekek

i am happy today
n possessed by the ghost called smile and laugh..
never know what happened to me, perhaps juzz a lot exhausting or tired
but the truth is i luv my life

i may not get everything iwanted to
but i got more than what i ever wanted to
:)

and im so delighted for that.
you never have to force yourself for the nature you can never conquer
but i think i let myself flow and let the life love my life itself

heheheh binun kannn
ahhhh udah ah mau pulang

talkin to my friend:
hei ai' pulang yuk,, tuh idung udah kembang kempis ditiup laler
anak ingusan ini bener bener lagi ingusan sekarang

hahahahaha
good partners. but i luv him anyway

okay
the rain stopped
the scent keep dancin in my nose
seducing me to come home at once

..... gudh nite my second home..... hehehehe

Read more...

living my own dreams

>> Friday 22 June 2007

argh
ini pake bahasa ajah, capeee.....

can u see the title...?
living my own dreams,
what if i have no dreams at all
or if the dreams fails and too vague to be real ???


masalahnya , i dont really feel like having one of them rite now,
atau jangan jangan aku punya cuman gak sadar..

yang jelas hari ini lagi sedihhhh
kerjaan teteup banyak, n temen temen tetep menyenangkan, tapi sepertinya kurang istirahat

n im loosing a good friend rite now, hikhik
sedih banget, di masa masa gini, gak bisa ketawa ketiwi sama this good friend ... rasanya aneh ajah

paling ngga, this is used to be my dreams,
maksudnya apa yang aku jalanin sekarang actually was what i dreamt about,
gosh i am living my own dreams

ampe ga sadar mana mimpi mana realita
terutama kalo kita menciptakan mimpi kita jadi realita

that is what happen to me
good things when i create a good one
tapi susah...
aku orangnya sumtimes mellow n gloomy
so,.
sometimes bad things happen

at least aku jadi binun mau ngomong apah

i had a sight for loosing this good fren
gak sengaja ( :((((

n now suddenly come into reality
okey, kecuali ama my dear good fren yang sekarang berubah sikap hikhik...

whatz wrong with yooouuuuu
got to tell me rite away ( sad mode : on )

pengen baikan lagi hik
dasar !
orang yang aneh.....

Read more...

AFFECTION ^_^ fall in... fall out ???????

>> Tuesday 19 June 2007

what do you think of friendship ??
:) tell me tell me

well.... i guess i dont know.


i have a wonderful feeling today.
big relieve kind of feeling

n i dont know why. :) mee just happyy happy
smiling smiling ooopss... without any reason hehe

i'm the kind of creature that cannot live without any friends :)

i cannot make my family as friend off course
for some reasons :) n i like to keep it for myself. hihi no offense i dun wanna talk bout it.

dont be intimidated, i dont hate my family, i luv them, GOd know that n i am not running away from them.

:) they just dont show me affection like what you always thought of.

affectionate for them means.. affection when you live in batavia aroung 1800 or early 1900 .( how did a family goes at that time :) )

not a modern ones. so i guess i need more :))
something that can make me feel comfort.

i broke my heart lately ( not because i fall in love... ) because some dissapointment of a friend, i guess i expect too much.


i thought i made friend with very trustable person, laughable, lovable and firm. and so i believe.
when i thought a friend could lean on one and another and so i do...

but somehow, something is still missing n my heart keep remind me that this friend perhaps not the right best buddy for me. :)

the faith only come from one side. not both , and i just realize that. but lack of faith could end up in worser fate of friendship.

when the fact came that my "i assume as good buddy friend " dont trust me, i began to be so so dissapointed. and terribly sad.

my good friend doesnt trust me,
and even worse, perhaps thought some different kind about me while i though that mate not suppouse to , ( since best buddy know their mate better than others)

the part that rejected my call became the million times of hurricane came and go.
and those twisters swept all the words which i called : FAITH . no faith stays longer in my head when it comes to that name.

perhaps you should leave when you start to diggin your own graveyard.
:)

well i dont wanna push my luck anyway.
i got too many good soul already which i called them friend
:) this time a real time friend.

^_^ friend who cares
friend who remembers
friend that are honest
friend that shares
really friends that stays in my heart n put the same pawprints of me in their heart

:) i believe i still can be happy.
loosing ones means i'll got so much more
:D

Read more...

Dear GOD

>> Wednesday 30 May 2007

Dear God,

didnt mean to interrupt you,
in your hassle times and minutes,
in your hasty hours and timeline

i kind of dissapointed..
for my thrown dreams, exiled by a good friend i thought he was
exclude by the flock i thought i'm in it

i dont like being unwanted... though it could be a harsh word he only said...
though i could be a joke he threw to make me laugh

but i'm not in my day yet......
let the silence said how angry i am.

Dear God,
i'm kind of very thankfull
for everything i got that you gave me
despites all the pain i still feel from the past..
and still encountered these days ........


dear GOD,
i'm kind a bit dizzy.
for not knowing what the hell that i want.

Read more...

... lost love ...

>> Tuesday 29 May 2007

a friend
is love without wings....

a life without mourn...

and a place where you can place your heart
and you know you will never loose it


still couldt figure out the phrase above,
but when it comes to a words friends....


i guess i know almost all about it..

one of my story recently n i'll tell you a bit of it........
............................................................................

my friend lost her love recent days

she left and find her own beauty and living
i guess its good for her,
dont really know her ex, dont really pay attention,
cause everyone has their own battles.

but i do care for her,
specially cause she is my gal
ones that do not deserve to be hurted.

he might done many things to here
and she stays in her agony and deepest mourn

but i guess GOd have plans for everybody
and everything happen for a reason

so

i need to say something to her
that whatever reasons God made for her

It will be the best ever....


...................................... =p

Read more...

...cest la vie....

>> Friday 4 May 2007

.nite..nite..nite..nite..
R u listening..??
am I whispering... or do I nothing than what i thought i were...

right now, I got my eyes on my notebook
trying to hear nothing but patrick fiori "que tu revienne ", struggling not to think
about working , jobs, duties which sound bizzare n utterly stressing
...( though i consider it as some terrible exctasy...)

I thought i heard some voices rite now, but i guess i'm just gazing..
contemplating, n try to get rid of my desk mate who cant get his eyes off my writing

while he just got some new buddies on friendster, and talk by himself.

and another one stays silence in his own uncomprehended worlds, doing zipped..unzipped..zipped.. and again and again....

...dear life..what did i do 3 years before now, never thought that tonight i'm heading some wonderful writing ( hehe my own ) and my two crazy fun mates...

though once i thought life is unfair...
by taking all my pieces unwrapped... loosing my breath, loosing myself n loosing all ambitious moody of living...

but still...
i got chance to meet these guyz, and you too... and another old crunchy mates...

=p
yet i change my life

from a dreary abandoned kitten on street to the local savoir faire kitten

heheheheheh
odd... mais cest la vie mon ami







Read more...

some voices inside my head

>> Monday 16 April 2007

its late at nite
n im still at my favourite place heheheh ( I wish...)

this is a very comfy office ( sometimes..)
too many cubicles with notebooks,
light in rows from one side of the wall to the other
small cabinets under the table
papers collected on the desk

and the clock is ticking
without noone listening

i'm waiting for some report before i leave
looking at my notebook waiting for a pop-up mail screaming and say
"yeup, you can go home you can go home... "

n still, im here killing my wonderful time by writing and writing
hope you dont fall asleep reading my below handwriting

= p

.............................................................................
mirror mirror
why do you stare at me

i sit among the silences
closing my eyes with whisper in my ears

let's sleep and never wake up
think of the night still that dawn never come

let's forgetand never remember
where the road behind hampered by the mist and be gone

let's got lost...... let's got lost
dont ever think to return
unconscious ...... stay ...... unconscious
................





well.... i am =D half unconscious anyway

# good night #

Read more...

..... am i gonna awake untill midnite ?????

>> Friday 13 April 2007

...Im still at the office

some things need to be cleared
need to be fixed

...lousy....
...drowsy...
...lazy.....


i wanna go home

gosh this is weekend dawg!

Read more...

----- pReLUdE

my first bloggggg
.......................

I wellcome you all
or none of you all

^_^

Read more...